*While Insecure is on hiatus, I will be reflecting back on episodes and dissecting parts that I found spoke to me. Here is what I got from Season 2, Episode 6 ; Hella Blows.
Sometimes people try so hard to find a underlying explanation for things that need no explanation. People (especially men) love to perceive women as these emotional beings who do not have the capacity to have a sexual encounter or relationship without “falling in love.” This is so far from the truth, which is why I truly enjoyed watching this episode of Insecure; Hella Blows.
A few episodes back, Issa went on a date with a guy named Nico whom she met through a online dating app. During this date, Issa clearly just wanted to jump his bones as soon as she could. Her subconscious alter ego was making all of these references to her having sex with him. Fast forward to this episode, Nico and Issa have made plans to go on a date but Issa has other plans to have sex with him now and eat dinner later. Nico shows up to Issa’s apartment to pick her up and when she opens the door, she is clearly half dressed with a terrible excuse claiming that her outfit that she planned on wearing was in the dryer. This girl had on a super mini skirt as well as a exposed bra with a little cardigan on. I tell you, when a woman’s mind is made up on her getting herself some, there ain’t no mountain high enough… ain’t no valley low enough… to keep a woman from getting to you babe!
Issa offers him some wine and music from her iPhone to clearly set the mood for this amazing sexual encounter that she had already mapped out in her head. When she sees the opportunity, Issa goes in for the kiss. As they are kissing, Nico stops Issa asking her to slow down. He then tells her how much he really likes her and that he wants more than just sex.” Issa is not here for any of that, “I want to get to know you” spiel. She wants the “D” and she wants it now. After passing up Issa’s offer to have sex, Nico still asks her if she still wants to go out for dinner. Issa; clearly sexually aggravated, air swats Nico and disappointedly replies with pure disgust and embarrassment on her face with a stern, “No!”
Finally seeing this role reversal was great. Women are usually portrayed as the one who wants the relationship, who wants to be respected by a man so she chooses to wait (stupid 90 day rule) and who would usually fall for the type of man who turns down sex in exchange for getting to know her. Issa plays the role of how most men are portrayed. All she wanted was some sex. She didn’t want to get to know Nico. She didn’t want to be wined and dined. She wanted to be f*cked and what the hell is wrong with that? This should not be so shocking in 2017 but it isn’t the norm because of what society puts on women. We don’t need to carry the responsibility of always being the giver. Sometimes we want to just take that and we should be able to do so without any negative connotation. I applaud Issa as the writer and as the character for showing their huge following that us women sometimes just want to be handled!
