- Untitled 41 in the Veneration of Light Collection -
It wasn’t until I was away from it for almost a year that I realized how much I am ruled by the ocean. I’ve always been a swimmer in love with the water. I’m compelled to dive in whenever I walk by a lake, pool, coastline. Now that I’m back, two blocks from the beach, I make sure to listen for the crashing waves, the barking sea lions, and feel gratitude for where I am able to live. .
The water understands
It wets my foot, but prettily,
It chills my life, but wittily,
It is not disconcerted,
It is not broken-hearted:
Well used, it decketh joy,
Adorneth, doubleth joy:
Ill used, it will destroy,
In perfect time and measure
With a face of golden pleasure
Elegantly destroy. —
— Water’, Ralph Waldo Emerson
#stilllife #curiosities #macabre #vanitas #skull #artlovers #naturalhistory #victoriangothic #deathpositive #mementomori #artistsoninstagram #wip #taxidermyart #fineartphotography #witchesofinstagram #deathpostiveart #photography #morbid #newcontemporaryart #wunderkammer #artofawitch #remnants #art #darkartandcraft #taxidermy #oddities #beautifulbizarre #odditiesandcuriosities #saatchiart #collection
Like ‘you’re dying’ In some people, its straight up anger—at God (when they believe in one), at the doctors, at their bodies. For others, it seems a lot less like anger and a lot more like an intense disbelief (coupled with an internal knowing). A man in a hospital bed next to my client once got so mad at the doctors for saying they couldnt continue to treat him, they gave him a sedative through an IV to calm him down. Another client once told me that if it wasn’t for the Lexapro she had been on for months to treat the depression associated with illness, she probably would have punched a wall when she was told. I believed her. What I’ve learned is that time, tenderness, grace, and finesse make this seemingly bitter pill a little easier to swallow. Death doulas do just that. Often these challenging conversations happen in doctors offices and are over in a few minutes. A death doula can sit and help process with a person and their loved ones for as long as they need to. If this is something you’d like to continue to develop in yourself, find us at www.goingwithgrace.com/training for more info.
Presented today to about 100 freshmen about hospice care, grief. I am stoked that these kiddos learned about what hospice is at a younger age than I did. Also, had to use some of Caitlin Doughtys work #deathpositive
I love cemeteries. It wasn’t always that way for me. I remember when I was a kid & my family went to a cemetery to visit my Great Grandparents’ grave, I refused to get out of the car because I was so terrified. The thought of death swirled around in my head obsessively in a fog of fear. It wasn’t until my late high school/early college years that death was becoming more of an interest than a fear. I played around with the idea of going in to the funeral industry but it was always just a fleeting thought. It wasn’t until 2017 that I put my curiosity into action & contacted my local funeral homes to talk with people directly that do the job every day. From that I landed my apprenticeship which turned in to a part time assistant job. My fear of death is now a death positive attitude. Now, I’m not saying that I’m not afraid of death. It’s natural to fear what is the unknown. I’m death positive in the sense that I’m okay talking about death, expressing what I’d want upon my own death & coming in contact with death. I’m happy to talk to anyone who may be struggling or hurting in any form with death. I’d also recommend the YouTube Channel and books from Caitlin Doughty @thegooddeath for more death positivity!
Some of the most frequently asked questions regarding funerals and what goes on in funeral homes.
Flowers: What happens to the flowers after a burial or cremation service Well after a burial the flowers will stay at the cemetery on the grave until they die or get eaten by the wildlife After a cremation service the flowers are left at the crematorium for a couple of days after. If no one collects them after this period then they are disposed of. You can take the flowers with you after a service, of course you can they are your flowers.
Ministers: Do families have to have a minister or celebrant to officiate at the service Short answer no! However most families find it really helpful and a comfort to let someone else officiate at the service. They can alleviate some of the burden And stress and can be a real help to a family.
Doctors: Why would a doctor need to check up on a dead person Well it’s not a check up it’s a none invasive external examination which has to be done by law. This is only done if a family chooses cremation. It then enables the doctors to complete cremation paperwork.
Post mortem movements: Do dead people sit up No! #funeral #funeralservice #funeraldirector #undertaker #mortician #morticianlife #death #deathcare #funeralhome #deathpositive #flowers #minsters #doctors #morgue #mortuary #deadpeople #cremation #burial #cemetery #crematorium #frequentlyaskedquestions
There are 3 questions we are asked often and/or are often misunderstood:
1. Why promote burial—isn’t cremation the most eco-friendly choice It takes 27 gallons of gasoline to cremate a single adult body, and releases 540 lbs. of CO2 per person. Green burial (*no embalming, biodegradable receptacle, etc) has the potential to completely return the body to the earth with no negative impact.
2. Aren’t you contributing to deforestation We source 100% of our supply from Waimanalo Wood (*or other Oahu mills with the same principles, if we need additional stock @jjkoallc), a sawmill *reclaiming* logs locally. The trees they process are offloaded by arborists who are paid by homeowners, the state, or private entities to remove problematic trees. Think: widening highways; invasive root systems; fall risk on homes, etc. The alternative is to chip or dump them to rot. Why not repurpose them into beautiful caskets!
3. How are you determining pricing—don’t you get the logs for free While Waimanalo Wood gets the trees for free, the manual labor to transform them from logs to viable lumber is a highly involved process. We pay for the milling. And it’s worth its weight in gold. The alternative is importing wood—a hefty carbon footprint. Unfortunately there’s no alchemy that can turn trees to planks (yet). We offer a range of caskets to accommodate diverse needs, from $2,000+ for softwood Pine to $4,000+ for hardwood Monkeypod. #deathpositive #aina #alohaaina #malamaaina #malamahonua
Brrr...winter is here. Luckily our death positive mascot is getting into the spirit and bundling up. This holiday, we want to challenge everyone to bring up death at the dinner table (it's better than politics, we promise). From discussing anxieties around death, to simply talking about what song you want played at your memorial service, let's end the year with some important conversations that gets everyone around the table thinking about their own mortality.
We want to wish everyone a happy and healthy holiday. To those of you grieving this season, we're thinking of you.
Baron Arlid Rosenkrantz - The Altar of the Soul
My Top 9 this year are a pretty good reflection on 2018: Finished pieces from my passion project #TheReclamation , all of the new sticker designs I introduced this year and the Death Positive pencils, me working feverishly to finish things before heading off to #DeathSalonBoston , art work and essays written in the wake of a close friend’s death, and the introduction of @shop_kalma ... This year has been a roller coaster of challenges and successes and I’m so glad for every one of you that has been along for the ride. I’m immensely grateful to be making big steps in growing my business in 2019 so that I can continue to offer lovely deathy things, and focus on producing a new body of artwork. Thank you for all of the words of encouragement and every time you vote with your dollars to support small businesses like mine. I literally couldn’t do it without you.🖤 AJ
When I sort through ephemera, I look for subjects who grab my interest... maybe they're cross-eyed, or have an odd nose... I love interesting faces! This woman caught my attention because her face was so gentle - I imagine she was kind, but we'll really never know.
I've always loved office supplies - there's something so lovely about finding the perfect practical tool that you need that also perfectly fits your style. I love that as you use these "It's Okay To Decay" pencils, the pencil gets shorter and decays... It too is a finite thing.
You need witnesses for wonder. Some things in life are too hard to see by yourself because they take up the whole sky, or because they happen every day, unwinding above your busyness, or because you thought you knew them already. Wonder takes a willingness to be uncertain, to be thrown. We have a lot of information these days, a few are enamored of imprecision or subtlety. But starlight traveling a bewildering distance for so long that there is every chance that it doesn't even exist anymore, and all of that having already happened, and you standing there, your face blazed in the dark by a starlight gone, seeing it all, what is and what isn't there enthroned by your witness: That is a marvel, and surely that is how awe is born in us. With somebody there alongside you in the darkness, you can think unauthorized thoughts. You can see what's gone, or whether it's gone, or both.
// Die Wise by Stephen Jenkinson
In Egam Churchyard, North Derbyshire, is the following epitaph, which seems to embody a superstitious belief respecting the death of one member of a family in seven years from the date of the death of another member of the family. Of course the lines were placed on the tomb after the event, and the safety of the prophecy was thus duly ensured.
Today you told me to "move on" from my grief.
You told me it was "time to let it go"
All I needed was a friend
Arms to fall into when I wasnt strong.
Instead I found only judgement and limits
Something I think I knew all along.
You told me I was "taking too long"
And that my sadness was too much to bear
I had to "stop being so upet"
And limit what I share.
Talking of my son bothered you
And in a way I understand,
Noone wants to admit children will sometimes die
Its never part of our plan.
Today you told me my grief was "too loud"
That I should stop speaking of that inevitable void
I wish I could live that way,
Because All I truly want,
Is to love and hold my precious boy... #griefjourney #griefduringholidays #grieving #grievingprocess #rememberingsigh #griefafterloss #deathpositive #griefpositive #griefhasnotimeline #griefhasnotimelimit
12:12 - EPIPHANY PART 3
I see the value in stepping away from data & stepping back into ourselves. They want us dependent.
12:12 - EPIPHANY PART 2
I see how much more valuable common sense/intuition/instinct is than they want us to believe. They want us stupid.
12:12 - EPIPHANY PART 1
I see the distance we have already created & are continuing to create. They want us hateful.
Find a charity .. there’s so many in need. Giving to others is a powerful medicine. One that when taken can ease our weary hearts. 💗 •Grief, Meet the Holidays•
My shop is changing in 2019. I'm bringing more focus to mourning, helping those who are in the throes of loss, and all that support the Death Positive movement. More originals, more accessories for Death Positive flair, and stationery. Of course there will be witchy and spooky vibes, but my natural direction has been to support those feeling the pain of having to live without those they love.
Anything you'd like to see in particular Let me know!
#shopsmall #supportsmallbusiness #supporthandmade #death #deathpositive #mementomori #mourning #meaganmeli #grief
My new piece for @medium - if you want an idea of what my book (link in bio) will be like, read this - how I used technology to deal (rather absurdly and unsuccessfully) with the realisation that anyone I’m not looking at might be dead.