Joey bought The Conjuring 2, since after all this time, I haven't watched it! So now that I have here's my final verdict: 3/10
Let's get real here.
I am actually still wondering why this movie gets the attention that it does except for the fact that it has a cool looking bad guy, who isn't even the main villain and is shoehorned in like nobodys business. It was painfully obvious that Valak was there cause the character design looks cool on a damn poster. The movie, in comparison to the first, was highly stylized and super Hollywood, versus its minimalistic and atmospheric predecessor. The story line was alright, but then reading the actual story kind of hurts the film, as it's all based upon a hoax that got bloated news coverage. I liked the overall feeling of doubt from outsiders when it comes to things like paranormal research, which was the most realistic part about it. However, scenes that could have been considered endearing were often cringy and boring. The main villain Bill is pretty awesome and used very effectively, but torn down by the characters Valak and the Crooked Man. Some cool effects happened but still weren't interesting or thrilling enough. Instead of continuing with effective subtlety, the scares are really rushed and in your face, unfortunately not in a good way. After the first scene you're already desensitized to the Valak character who just becomes progressively less frightening over the few scenes where the character is used. All in all, wouldn't watch it again and the only reason I'm glad I did is to know that hype is hype as always, and James Wan cannot direct a good sequel.
This one is just another added to the pile of bad, overrated horror flicks that have come out in the last decade.
#gruesometwosomereviews #horrorreviews #theconjuring2 #jameswan #horror #modernhorror
A jazzy but very violent experimental pop horror flick that I thoroughly enjoyed. Mickey Keating knows how to keep it interesting even amidst the obvious influences of directors we still dig. Larry Fessenden is a nice choice and don't sleep on any of the other performances either. Super Craxk + #psychopaths #mickeykeating #horrormovies #horror #horrorreviews #moviereviews #supercraxk
I remember growing up and going to the local Blockbuster and one of my favorite things to do besides viewing the awesome VHS cover art in the Horror section was flipping through the pages of my then-favorite Horror magazine Fangoria and they always had this special edition advertised and about 2 years ago I finally got a copy and it is fascinating to read reviews about films at that time getting bad reviews but today are considered cult classics. A very interesting read which makes one feel like they are stepping back in time. #fangoria #horrormagazines #horrorreviews #70shorror #80shorror #horrorhound #horroraddict
Dark Universe Reviews 'Silent Blood Night 🖤💀🖤 The “actors” (for lack of a better word) all deliver their English dialogue in hilariously awkward Austrian accents incapable of pronouncing “v” correctly. This gives the film such a bizarre feel. It’s almost as if the whole thing is a joke, perhaps an homage to ‘Allo, Allo’. But the filmmakers don’t seem self-aware enough for this to be the case.
Apparently it was released in 2006 despite having very early digital picture quality akin to VHS. It feels like a throwback to 70’s sexploitation. The philosophy behind the scenes seems to be “we need more T&A!” The overuse of scantily clad actresses is so desperate and excessive that it seems like self-parody.
I’d explain the plot but there isn’t one. The nonsensical script made me feel like my mind was being pushed through a cheese grater and into a trash bin.
The pacing drags on terribly. It was quite a struggle to make it to the end. It was very tempting to turn it off halfway through and write my review regardless. No one would have known. Unfortunately I decided to be honest and watch all 84 crap-tastic minutes. It’s time I’ll never get back. Without the unintentional comedy and some over the top Troma style violence it would be unwatchable.
I feel sorry for everyone behind this movie. They tried their best to make their own Austrian version of an American horror film. They were limited by a low budget, outdated equipment and an incompetent cast. They made Silent Blood Night as a serious horror movie. It did make me scream, only with laughter.
Why would anyone make such a ridiculously bad movie I smell a ‘Springtime for Hitler’ style money laundering scheme. It has to be the only explanation, surely.
I’ll end my review with a quote from someone else’s. I went on IMDb to get some background information, hoping some context might help me better understand and process the garbage I had just watched. Instead I found a very accurate description of Silent Blood Night by one user: “It looks like it was filmed by a horse and edited with a potato masher.” by Gareth Paterson 🖤🐺🖤 @gareth_paterson_ #darkuniversereviews #silentbloodnight #badhorrormovies
The Open House
Genre(s): Movie, Horror, Suspense
A teenager and his mother find themselves besieged by threatening forces when they move into a new house.
The whole idea of the movie was great an all, but I definitely hated how everything led to the end. It didn’t seem right (). You know that feeling you get when you watch something and you have that gut feeling or that thought in the back of your head telling you “No, that’s wrong” That’s what I had. The tragic death of a father and the terrifying experiences of things disappearing is really cliché and I love clichés but it could’ve been pulled off better. Things were slow when rising to the climax and was still slow when getting the ending. Despite all that it did keep me on the edge of my seat wondering what was bound to happen to the now widowed mother and her teenage son. There were times where I was actually disturbed, not scared but disturbed. Mostly whenever the neighbor came around, she gave me bad vibes until something was revealed about her. Poor woman.
Level of Recommendation: Low
#horror #horrorfan #horrorfans #horrormovies #horrormovie #movierecommendation #movie #movies #netflixoriginal #netflixoriginals #theopenhouse #theopenhousereview #theopenhousemovie #review #reviews #horrorreview #horrorreviews
House III: The Horror Show (1989): House III: The Horror Show (as it is known in international markets—in the US it was released simply as The Horror Show) takes a decidedly darker turn than the previous two films in the franchise with an Elm Street/Shocker-style slasher film that certainly feels incredibly derivative but still manages enough bizarre 1980s charm to entertain a specific target audience. There are still enough elements central to the franchise here but—like the sequel—there is a change up here. While the comedic elements are mostly gone (the killer spouts out second-rate Freddy-isms throughout) the horror elements are back in force. Following the trials of a detective as he tries to destroy a psychotic killer…who was executed in the electric chair already and now has returned as some kind of spirit/demon. We get some strong/entertaining central performances from both #lancehenriksen and #brionjames as the protagonist and antagonist respectively. Both actors shoot for the moon here and, while their performances are pretty OTT, I can’t say I wasn’t entertained throughout. SFX work here is strong (especially in the uncut version from @arrowvideo which is Region-free) with some great, gory sequences (the electrocution scene is killer) but there are still several moments where the filmmakers cut away from something—which was strange. Either way, there are still plenty of WTF moments that feel very House-esque—which nicely connects things visually. The biggest drawback here is the derivative nature of the film. It shares so much in common with A Nightmare on Elm Street and Shocker which is interesting because this came out 5-years after Nightmare but was released theatrically months before Shocker. That being said, it’s hard not to compare the film to these other films (especially considering producer Sean Cunningham’s professional relationship to Wes Craven). While the film doesn’t stand out all that much and, as a result, dragged a bit for this horror-fan, House III: The Horror Show was still plenty entertaining and a fun watch when marathoned with the other films in the franchise. My least favorite so-far but still a good deal of zany fun.